Whod you bang
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Dear god my vagina.
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