sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
As shirtless as possible
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
