She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I wish i was in the wii world.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
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