i think i have herpe
just one?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
