no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
