am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
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