You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
