your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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