$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize