She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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