im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
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I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
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Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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