Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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