Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
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