I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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