My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
