maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize