Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
