hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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