just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
