I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
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