I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize