he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
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