My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Randomize
