Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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