Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better

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  (610): So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better http://tfl.nu/c25s
  Replies (54) Good night (750) Bad night (6404)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance

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  (801): The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance http://tfl.nu/4nxj
  Replies (10) Good night (4489) Bad night (548)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.

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  (610): A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex. http://tfl.nu/u4lo
  Replies (29) Good night (6061) Bad night (1189)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.

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  (513): Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule. http://tfl.nu/z55h
  Replies (25) Good night (3848) Bad night (984)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.

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  (641): Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that. http://tfl.nu/2jzp
  Replies (27) Good night (8878) Bad night (3329)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right

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  (914): Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right http://tfl.nu/mx4p
  Replies (18) Good night (1599) Bad night (3974)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention

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  (845): Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention http://tfl.nu/alzz
  Replies (9) Good night (4238) Bad night (1254)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order

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  (703): I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order http://tfl.nu/64q0
  Replies (11) Good night (1264) Bad night (4052)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?

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  (+44): Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones? http://tfl.nu/hoh3
  Replies (8) Good night (1629) Bad night (3795)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?

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  (708): So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS? http://tfl.nu/0qn8
  Replies (25) Good night (1916) Bad night (4250)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"

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  (781): he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me" http://tfl.nu/6fll
  Replies (16) Good night (1589) Bad night (2692)
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  (941): View more from Florida

  Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?

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  (941): Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night? http://tfl.nu/uq24
  Replies (18) Good night (5327) Bad night (824)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.

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  (412): You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you. http://tfl.nu/l1dm
  Replies (7) Good night (689) Bad night (1072)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after

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  (403): His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after http://tfl.nu/sq85
  Replies (5) Good night (262) Bad night (719)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..

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  (940): Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku.. http://tfl.nu/zv8o
  Replies (1) Good night (894) Bad night (260)

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