mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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