have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
