I understand Curling. That high.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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