i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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