you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Terrible idea I love it
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
