that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
