Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important

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(780): Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important http://tfl.nu/ydfw

Replies (19) Good night (2656) Bad night (724)
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(773): View more from Illinois

im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me

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(773): im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me http://tfl.nu/r5gz

Replies (14) Good night (941) Bad night (4617)
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(519): View more from Ontario

We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on

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(519): We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on http://tfl.nu/80ye

Replies (12) Good night (3841) Bad night (2044)
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(419): View more from Ohio

The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .

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(419): The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. . http://tfl.nu/zh9v

Replies (24) Good night (7735) Bad night (1182)
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(516): View more from New York

Found your pants in the mailbox

(646): View more from New York

What were my pants doing in the mailbox?

(516): View more from New York

I don't know but there's postage on them

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(516): Found your pants in the mailbox (646): What were my pants doing in the mailbox? (516): I don't know but there's postage on them http://tfl.nu/6yt8

Replies (36) Good night (6174) Bad night (1356)
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(518): View more from New York

All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up

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(518): All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up http://tfl.nu/3pu3

Replies (16) Good night (889) Bad night (5141)
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(316): View more from Kansas

As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.

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(316): As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on. http://tfl.nu/xyx3

Replies (6) Good night (746) Bad night (3791)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring

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(860): Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring http://tfl.nu/m17v

Replies (4) Good night (1898) Bad night (836)
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(229): View more from Georgia

I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.

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(229): I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did. http://tfl.nu/0cy8

Replies (12) Good night (1329) Bad night (882)
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(44): View more from United Kingdom

All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet

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(44): All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet http://tfl.nu/lx51

Replies (3) Good night (860) Bad night (1670)
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(260): View more from Indiana

And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina

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(260): And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina http://tfl.nu/ymsd

Replies (3) Good night (650) Bad night (1036)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"

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(610): There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division" http://tfl.nu/egg0

Replies (2) Good night (1524) Bad night (568)
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(727): View more from Florida

I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.

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(727): I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult. http://tfl.nu/f77x

Replies (2) Good night (646) Bad night (522)
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(856): View more from New Jersey

I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering

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(856): I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering http://tfl.nu/ry4c

Replies (7) Good night (644) Bad night (399)
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(760): View more from California

He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.

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(760): He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted. http://tfl.nu/b6x4

Replies (2) Good night (502) Bad night (235)

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