I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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