Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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