no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
