Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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