So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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