Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
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I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
The air was thick with penises
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i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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