That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
