you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
