It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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