ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Found the puke drawer
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize