My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
