i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
