I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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