so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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