Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize