Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
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took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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