It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
