apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
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